That troubling feeling of uncertainty.
It is like trying to hold a fistful of water; for the quickest of moments– but no, no of course not.
So you have to let it freeze over and turn to ice. But then the surface is so very cold, it pricks your skin and once again, you have to let go.
This is not what you wanted, what you imagined.
Close, so close.
All you thought of, your mind saturated in the sickly, sticky sweet fantasies that pressed themselves so firmly against the forefront of your vision, so hard, to blink and have them suddenly vanish made your chest hurt.
Your chest hurt now.
You watch until your eyes burn. The numbness that seeps into your skin comes from inside out, makes you feel as if you are floating.
Vision blurry, cheeks wet.
Perhaps you have passed through a cloud.